Pray Party Scream was born from the realization that life is all three. We pray through uncertainty, fear, anxiety, we celebrate the victories. And sometimes we need to scream because life hurts. This is what this space is about.
Looking back, I can see what I couldn’t see while I was living it. God never left. He was there in Chicago. He was there in California. He was there in the heartbreak, the uncertainty, the opportunities, the miracles, and the ordinary moments. Even when I couldn’t recognize Him, He was already making a way.
That’s what Pray Party Scream means to me. Pray when you don’t know what to do, party when God gives you something to celebrate, scream when life becomes overwhelming but just keep walking! Hope can’t be purchased. Joy is a choice. Faith isn’t always having the answer but trusting the One who does. As Frank Sinatra sang, “You’re riding high in April, show down in May.”
Here’s my story…
I’m Danielle and I grew up in Chicago, Illinois. My mom is the one who introduced me to God. As a little girl, I would watch her pray the rosary and wonder who she was talking to. We would go to church together a lot. St. Mathias is where I was baptized, it’s also where I witnessed someone steal my mom’s purse during mass. I was 5. Looking back, I laugh because even my earliest memories of faith came with a little bit of chaos. We eventually moved to Oak Park, a suburb outside of Chicago where my dad was from. That’s where the magic happened.
My childhood felt like the movie Now and Then. I mostly credit that to him. He was a blue-collar electrician, the kind of person who worked hard with his hands but somehow always had the energy to make life an adventure. He also taught me you don’t need a lot of money to have a rich life. In the summer, my friends and I caught fireflies, rode bikes, went swimming, and stayed outside until the sun went down. In the winter, we built snow forts, made snow angels, went sledding, and had snowball fights. We lived on the South Side of town, but also had a lake house in Indiana. The only time I got new clothes was for my birthday, or Christmas. My mom usually shopped at the thrift store for everything, and honestly…I still do! Life was great. My childhood felt like a dream. Until – my parents got divorced. My dog, Batman died. My friends abandoned me and I was left hating myself. I faked it pretty good though. I got through high school, went to Arizona State University, joined a sorority (Alpha Phi), got into an abusive relationship, made mistakes, dropped out of school, moved back to Chicago. I worked and planned parties and threw events for a tanning salon chain. I lived across the street from Wrigley Field – I went back to St. Mathias hoping I could find answers, but left with even more questions. Then one night I had a dream. Jesus was on fire coming toward me and I was running away from him. I was so scared, I needed direction so I went to a psychic and she said “There’s something you’ve always wanted to do..” The next morning I bought a one-way ticket to California, donated all my stuff to Goodwill and told my parents I was leaving.
When I got to California it was everything I knew it to be. The colors were brighter, you could smell the ocean and the Eucalyptus trees. I ran into to several celebrities just out and about running errands. I thought…this is the life for me! I lived in a Hostel in Santa Monica on 2nd street. It was $25/day, they fed you and gave you wristbands for the bars. Then – I wasn’t able to stay at the Hostel anymore, they said they only can keep people up to 3 weeks, so I prayed and asked God what to do…and there it was, a flyer that read: ZUMA HOUSING, I walked to their office and sat outside, a younger gentleman asked what I wanted, I told him I needed a place to live. His voice sounded familiar. It turned out he was also from Chicago. He and his brother ran a housing apartment complex for foreign exchange students studying English. I asked him if he had any rooms. He said yes, and I shared a two bedroom one bath with four other girls. The first month, I called my mom and she gave me the rent money. I brought my one suitcase from the hostel to my new home and immediately took the bus to and from Hollywood, and passed out my resume! I saw this beautiful church right on Sunset Blvd. The cross stood firm and high in the sky and I walked in. After I poured my heart out, I walked down Fountain and ran into one of the editors coming out of the building…It was a Post-Production Studio. I told him I was looking for work, and he told me they’re looking for Client Services Coordinators. I met the hiring manager and was hired on the spot! From then on I fell in love with the industry. I eventually worked at Sony, produced commercials and photo shoots, worked on tv shows and feature films, spent time in education, finished my college degree and ultimately found my home in visual effects. During that season, I had a boyfriend who was truly a Godsend. He was part of a chapter where I learned what love, partnership, and life together could look like. After two years, we realized we were heading in different directions, and we lovingly went our separate ways. I moved into my own place off Wilcox near Hancock Park and embraced my “LA single life.” I became a member at Soho House, started creating my collages and rosaries, and fully stepped into the person I always knew I wanted to become. In many ways, it felt like coming home to myself.
Then God surprised me.
I met my husband through a dating app. He was from Ireland, with a charm that was impossible to miss and an accent that made me smile every time he spoke. He brought a piece of another world into my life — new traditions, new stories, and a love that would eventually become our family. Our story moved quickly — three months later, we were expecting our first child. What could have felt terrifying became one of the greatest gifts of my life. We got married, built a family, and three kids later, here I am.
My husband came into my life at a time when I had spent years searching for who I was. He has walked beside me through the beautiful, chaotic, exhausting, and sacred moments of raising a family. Together, we’ve built a life I never could have imagined when I was that girl boarding a one-way flight to California.
If you’ve ever felt lost, joyful, overwhelmed, hopeful—or all of those in the same week—you belong here. My hope is that this space reminds you that God is still writing your story, too.
❤ Danielle
Pray Party Scream 